Everyone has an Incredible Story, It is About Overcoming Challenges

We are all faced with challenges in life; some are more obvious and others are easier to overcome. A flat tire on the way to work can be a challenge, since you are going to be late for an important meeting or 8 am clinic. ~ Do you call a friend for help, leave the car and Uber to work, or change the tire since you have a spare in the back. These are simpler obstacles that we face on a daily basis and sometimes we can easily fix it.

I work with patients and families with challenges that may not be as easy to overcome. With time, everyone figures out a way to navigate through life.  However, it is not always the most optimal way. This may be due to limited economic resources, lack of family support, undiagnosed medical problem, or cultural and societal biases.  

I am a vertically challenged (3’7”) South Asian American third culture Hijabi Muslim female. I have been dealing with challenges every day since I was a toddler. This has helped me gain some insight on dealing with challenges. I have also had the opportunity to learn from others. Everyone has an incredible story and it always includes people that have impacted/supported him or her in life.

Over the next few months, I am going to start blogging again and address a few of the issues that I believe impact overcoming challenges and specifically your child’s potential. My angle is going to be from my personal experience as a South Asian American but I believe it is also true for others.   

I would like to end with one of my favorite verses/stories from the Quran that always gives me strength to overcome my challenge.

[Musa (Moses)] said: "O my Lord! Open for me my chest (grant me self-confidence, contentment, and boldness). And ease my task for me; And remove the impediment from my speech, so they may understand what I say.” [Surah Ta-Ha; 20:25-28] 

"Itsy Bitsy Doctor"

"Good Morning, I am Dr. Merchant, one of the doctors who will be taking care of you today. How is your son doing?...I'll be back with the team for rounds."

As I am walking out of the room, I overhear a conversation... "she is a short... dwarf... midget... small... grown-up... doctor!" 

At the beginning of my intern year,  it took me a while to get used to hearing that on a daily basis. I have grown up hearing that I am "short," but never reminded on a daily basis. Surprisingly, even in medical school, I did not hear it that often. This is probably due to most of my rotations being with adults. Also, I wasn't a main caretaker. 

Some of you must be thinking, how can she easily forget and move on with her day if she is repeatedly reminded of her challenge. Well, I have been hearing people talk about my stature for 20+ years. So hearing a comment does not surprise me. I enjoy hearing the different comments made by children, its a reminder of their innocence and curiosity of the world. Thats the reason I chose to work with kids! 

More to follow about my peds intern year... I am back to writing posts. 

Sometimes Patients Leave A Mark

Last week, a fourth year student excitedly came over to my Neurology course director to tell him about an interesting case with neurological findings. I got assigned the patient, and to my pleasant suprise I could take a full history since he spoke Urdu (I love being able to communicate with the patient without needing an interpreter - many patients only speak Arabic in Qatar). The patient did have intriguing neurological findings, but this is not the reason patient left a mark in me!

This middle-age gentleman was my first patient with cancer who had gone through intense chemo and radiotherapy over the last fourteen months. The gentleman told me his story with passion and emotion that I had tears in my eyes that were on the verge of bursting as I saw how he felt he is a warrior battling his disease. When I asked the gentleman if he had any family in Qatar, he replied saying that the doctors, nurses, and social workers are his second family that have supported him in fighting his cancer. He is blessed to have been working in a country that strives to provide medical care to any resident of Qatar without looking at their social status, especially since he could not have afforded this quality of health-care and chemotherapy. He is fighting metastatic renal cell carcinoma, which is known to have a relatively poor five-year prognosis.

After completing my examination and closing up with the patient, he wrote my name down in his diary and said that he will make sure to include me in his prayers as I strive to become a healer one day.

I admired this gentleman for his strength, will-power, and practical optimism towards fighting , cancer and acknowledging his blessings in life. Even though his family and children live across the sea, he fills that void with the "family" he has in Doha without complaining.

When we are faced with little challenges and all we do is complain and complain and complain about the little "hardship" we are faced with in life. Hence, I walked out of that room thinking I should appreciate everything I have and stop complaining about my neurology write-ups! :P

Ready for 4th year?

This week we had fourth year orientation/preparation for USMLE CS! Time to work on personal statement, CV, study for USMLE Step 2 CS and CK, and prepare for NYC - SubI and electives.

Majority of us have decided what specialty we will be applying for this September.

Now we are thinking about everything we have done in the last few years to add in our CV! I wish I had updated my CV in the last three years, it's quite a task to go through emails and papers to remember the dates for which I had volunteered at a certain conference, help organize a medical camp, and participated in big-sib program.

Yesterday, we had OSCE's and most of us left the OSCE thinking we need to do some more practice in breaking news, taking a more thorough history and making sure we dont forget to ask simple questions such as drinking, smoking, or medications and allergies. Oh and definitely not forget to wash hands, especially after our professor reminded us like 50 times!! Also, remember to think common is common, like in Qatar the most common car is white Land Cruiser! Nonetheles, we are much more confident now then we were during our first year OSCE's.

The first group has left to nyc for their clinical electives and SubI. I have one month of Neurology now and then I am heading to NYC for Pediatric SubI!

In 10 years, 20 years, 30 years???

I always thought getting into college would be tough, then maybe getting into medical school. Now, as I look back, I think those were much easier than getting into RESIDENCY! I guess every step just gets harder, but you learn and eventually make it!

Third year almost coming to an end: finished internal medicine, surgery and PEDIATRICS! and now doing Ob-Gyn! I have Neurology left, and then Im off to NYC for 2 months for my clinical experience in Peds in NYC! I'm EXCITED!!

My clerkships are a major part of my life as I acquire the skills and knowledge in the various fields, but we are also quite preoccupied in choosing our future. Our class is deciding whether we want to be a clinician, pathologist, radiologist, or a surgeon. It is a tougher choice than Id imagined. We have probably spent hours contemplating on our future. These are a few of the questions we are answering as we choose a field of choice:
1. Do I want to have a field with focus on academics, research, mostly clinical work, or a balance of them all?
2. How do I decide between all the fields I enjoyed(and maybe for some people hated)?
3. Should lifestyle be important?
4 Can I have time for a family with my career? Get married during residency?
5. Length of training?
6. Job in the future and where Id want to work?
7. Grades, research requirement for certain fields and competition?
8. Accept IMG's?
9. AND the MOST IMPORTANT Question: Where do I see and feel the spark? Do I have a passion? and What will I be able to do best?

For me, I have been thinking about pediatrics-genetics before I started medical school, but I was always ready to change my field if I saw the spark in another field. But I guess, my passion lies in peds-genetics!
Currently, the dream is becoming a reality as I am working on the paperwork for electives, discuss with faculty, and applications.

So where do I see myself in 10yrs, 20yrs, 30yrs? Well, as many of you know, I always say "wherever my life leads me! Im always open to new ideas and challenges!"

SURGERY!

As promised, my experience as a surgeon... as faculty say, "Medical students believe they need to do a procedure three times to claim they are experts." So I can call myself a surgeon for the time being, since I have seen and/or scrubbed in a lap chole, lumpectomy and appendectomy three times! :P

As I walked into the operating room on the first day, the nurses, doctors and nursing aid were all a bit startled, to say the least. I was ready to scrub in on the first day! I had my scrubs and all personal protective equipment ready to scrub into my first procedure - hemorrhoidectomy! After scrubbbing into the first procedure, I knew surgery was gonna be an awesome clerkship.

So far it has been great. On an OR day, the maximum number of surgeries I have scrubbed into is four!

Surgery is almost over, less than 3 weeks till exams.

What is it like to be a 3rd year med student?

Honestly, I am having the best time ever. I have a feeling, this is going to be the best year ever since I have been at Cornell. I have finished my 3 month medicine clerkship and now I am doing my 3 month surgery clerkship. And I just love it, even though we have to work longer hours!

It is a great change from daily lectures and weekly exams. The interaction with patients, learning to examine patients, reaching a differential diagnosis, ordering investigations and being able to scrub into your patient's operation really makes you feel like your hard work is important and does pay off! It's a great reminder and daily motivation to keep studying to become a great physician in the future.

My experience is probably similar to all of my class with a little bit of a twist. I don't think its a common sight to see a 3'7" doctor-in-training, especially in a Gulf country. Hence, people have all sorts of reactions. I have never really seen so many different facial expressions in my life and people turn around to look back at me, when I walk in the corridor of the hospital. I am used to people staring at me, clearly pointing me out to their friend or family, and making comments. But I have never had to face so many different expressions in one day. Over the years, I have learned to ignore and in the last three months I think I dont even notice it anymore since I have gotten "immune" to it.

The most common question I get asked is the obvious "are you a doctor?" In my head at 7am in the morning, I'm thinking "duh, why would I be in a white coat with a stethescope and badge-I dont think its Halloween season! and I dont think I look like a little kid playing dress-up!" I just politely answer I am a medical student.

Several times, I have had people approach me to take my picture. I politely refuse. I am always alarmed when someone suddenly approaches me with their phone and is like can I take a picture of you. With the era of all cell phones having cameras these days, I think someone could take a picture without even me noticing. But if you asked me, I have the right to refuse and escape quickly, hide between people in my team during morning rounds. I once had a lady quickly walk behind me after I refused and I made an quick escape. I believe she got by back, since I heard the click made by nokia phones.
"I wonder how would someone take it, if I asked a random person in the hallway to take a picture of them." -- I believe they would think I am a spy or a crazy person.

But one thing is for sure, patients have shown no hesitance to having me examine them and follow-up with them. Sometimes, patients will offer to move towards the edge of the bed, they will sit down on the chair instead of on the bed so I can examine them properly. While persuing medical school I had a slight fear about me getting around the hospital and interacting with patients. However, I also knew I would be alright, since my height has never been an issue and has never stopped me. And I guess I was right.
Also, patient's care about being treated properly and being respected, hence they do not care what their doctor looks like and who he or she is if they can have their health back.

USMLE mania!!!

I feel like the anxiety in our class is going to burst! Every time I turn around to talk to someone, we have only two things to talk about. The MOST important one is USMLE! We are discussing schedules, books, plans for studying, NBME, USMLE World, USMLE Rx, First Aid, BRS, plans after the exam, topics we love, topics we hate, and much more....

I put a schedule together in spring break and I keep going back to it and making changes. I think I am finally satisfied with it. I plan on doing intense studying 12-14 hrs a day and sleeping 8 hrs, this leaves me with almost no free time. Hence, I will have to totally isolate myself. :( Lets hope I pass with flying colors and do not go crazy! (Upperclass's have warned us that you will do some crazy stuff, just watch out and realize it is alrite and stop yourself from trying anything "new.") I have attached my schedule for you to see what is ahead of you. In 39 days, I need to review material covered in the last two years and more. Honestly, I have a feeling after it is done, we are going to feel ready for the wards with all the theory at our fingers.

Currently, we are studying Infectious Disease = Parisatolgy, Vaccines, TB, HIV, Meningitis... Have the exam Sunday, and then we have one more exam and we are done with second year!

Its the end of the year, so its always busy. International Evening April 23, Class of 2009 Grad May 6, Convocation Ceremony May 5, Medical Camp that offers free medical care to labor class in Qatar April 17, and more... ofcourse also USMLE!!!

Physical Diagnosis!

Today was the last session for physical diagnosis part of the MPS II course (Medicine, Patients and Society). We have been going to the hospital for three hours on Monday morning to practice taking medical history and physical examination. Now we will be tested next week on our medical history and physical examination skills.

These sessions are for our future. In three months, we will be practicing the skills we learned everyday in the past two years in the three hour sessions once a week to diagnose and manage a patient on our own (of course with physicians monitoring us!)

Whats going on these days?

1. Currently we are studying Heme/Onc. I have to say it is very interesting and something we deal with everyday, such as anemia!

2. Match results: Amazing! Congrats class 2009, wish you all the best and you will be missed! http://qatar-weill.cornell.edu/media/reports/2009/matchDay09.html

3. Coffee House is Thursday! I've been hearing there are some awesome performances this year. Also, the musical "Wicked" by Education City students including a Cornell student in Class of 2011! Amazing show! Worthwhile to see, its playing all week in QF theater!

4. Cricket! We came first for the third time in Education City Cricket league! Great job boys!!

Dermatology over Spring Break

Im home for spring break, for me that is currently Saudi Arabia. But being home does not mean being away from uni. I have to finish two papers, study for an exam that I have the first day back from classes, make a USMLE schedule, try to start studying for USMLE Step 1, and review physical examination. Also, enjoy the break! I dont have a summer holiday, since the summer break is really a study break for USMLE. As everyone around me is planning their summer holidays to visit family and friends, I am making a USMLE schedule for my summer holiday (6weeks). It consists of 10-11 hr day of studying and break for lunch, dinner and possibly gym once in a while.

This leads me to a question that many applicants have asked me over and over again: Am I satisfied with the decision I made to go into medical school? Sometimes I may feel overwhelmed and overworked. But I do not regret choosing medicine. It requires most of your energy, but in the long run it is really worth it! So keep your spirits high!

Tom is a big day for Cornell! The 4th years find out if they have been matched! Wish them all the best!